kirin_saga (kirin_saga) wrote,
kirin_saga
kirin_saga

The Banned List by Optimus Prime - Updated August 21

So, on the Bunny Farm, several of us have talked about movies/books/etc that Optimus has banned. And I suddenly had the idea to type up the list(s). Feel free to suggest anything. If you think any of these need a ficlet, feel free to write it (unless it already has a ficlet).

Edit: Added some items. To see who suggested what, scroll down to the comments. I also put the list under a cut as it's getting a bit long.

The Banned List
By Optimus Prime

Note: List subject to change or grow without warning.

1. Back to the Future
Why: Perceptor and Wheeljack built a time machine.

2. Cartoon Network
Why: Perceptor.

3. This is Spinal Tap
Why: See incident report. Incident number 9.

4. Discovery Channel
Why:  Removed from list due to Perceptor's glare of angry kitten doom.

5. Mythbusters
Why: Perceptor and Wheeljack.

6. Bill Nye the Science Guy
Why: See number 5.

7. Jurassic Park
Why: Ratchet and Wheeljack. Too late.

8. Godzilla
Why: Dinobots.

9. The Song That Never Ends
Why: Blaster. Song added at the request of Eject and Rewind.

10. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
Why: Perceptor.

11. X-Files
Why: Red Alert. Show added at Inferno's request.

12. Silent Hill
Why: Unknown. Movie added at Perceptor's request. Removed from list at the request of a rather creepy little girl. How the hell did she get on the Ark anyways?

13. Land Before Time
Why: See number 8.

14. Home Alone
Why: Sideswipe.

15. Lord of the Rings
Why: Dinobots. Added at the request of Mirage. Also added at the request of Ratchet. Note to Ratchet: Did they really stand in front of Devastator and shout "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"?

16. Peter Pan
Why:

17. Harry Potter
Why:

18. History Channel
Why: Unknown. Requested by Spike and Sparkplug.

19.
Caramelldansen
Why: See number 9. Video has also caused numerous fights.

20. Danjo
Why: Requested by Bumblebee and Bluestreak.

21. Speed Racer - All Versions
Why: Twins, Tracks, and Blurr. Especially Blurr.

22. House, MD
Why: Ratchet. He's bad enough as he is, no need to give him any ideas.

23. Office Space
Why: Brawn. Too late. Note to Self: Buy new copier.

24. Ripley's Believe It Or Not
Why: Ratchet, Wheeljack, Perceptor, Skyfire. Something about foam. Don't ask.

25. Star Wars
Why: Unicron. Note to Autobots: Unicron is not the Death Star, no matter how much you think he looks like it. Note to Red Alert: No, the humans are not in league with the Chaos Bringer. Please put the cannon down now.

26. Children's Songs
Why: See number 9.

27. The For Dummies book series
Why:

28. The Complete Idiot's Guide [entire series]
Why: See number 27.

29. Military Channel
Why: Warpath. Added at the request of the United States Armed Forces.

30. Paranormal Television Shows
Why: See number 11.

31. MTV
Why: The song I Kissed A Girl. Note to Blaster and Jazz: Blasting that song, repeatedly, at high volume will not get me to remove MTV from the list.

32. I Kissed A Girl
Why: Blaster and Jazz.

33. Dark Cloud
Why: Wheeljack.

34. Book: Animal Wise, the Spirit Language and Signs of Nature
Why: Hound and Beachcomber. Note to Hound and Beachcomber: No, we do not care what it means when animals look at us and fluff their fur a certain way. Shut up about it already.

35. Antique Roadshow
Why: Smokescreen

36. Breaking Vegas
Why: See number 35.

37. Health Channel (only allowed in previously approved areas)
Why: Causes ill health. Requested by everyone not in a medical profession.

38. Books on Etiquette
Why: Prowl.

39.
Metal Gear Solid
Why: Mirage. Something about boxes.

40. Handyman Books
Why: Wheeljack. Let's keep the inventions in the lab, please.

41. Naruto
Why: "Believe it!"

42. Voodoo Dolls
Why: Trust me, you don't want to know.

43. Shrunken Heads
Why: See number 42.

42. Power Rangers (All Versions)
Why:

43. Reading Rainbow
Why: Perceptor and Bluestreak.

44. The Making of the Dictionary

Why: Perceptor. This show must be kept from Perceptor at all costs.

45. Artemis Fowl

Why: Red Alert, Wheeljack, and Perceptor. Note: No, Red Alert, there are no faeries under the floor. Wheeljack, don't even think it. And Perceptor, put that down!

46. Monty Python

Why: The Twins, Wheeljack, and Perceptor. Something about bridges, killer rabbits, and swallows. I really don't want to know any more than that.

47. It's A Small World After All

Why: Twins. Added at the request of everyone (including Blaster, much to my surprise. Apparently, there are songs he doesn't like).

48. Discworld

Why: Perceptor. Something about L-Space (whatever that is), Dungeons, and... the Rite of AshkEnte? Added at the request of a robed skeleton (I'm not even going to ask).

49. Gremlins
Why: Perceptor. Note to Perceptor: I don't care how cute you think it is; you are not keeping it!

50. Forensic Files

Why: Red Alert. He really doesn't need anymore ideas.

51. Murder By the Book
Why: See number 50.

52. TruTV
Why: Again, see number 50. Whose bright idea was it to let Red Alert control the remote anyways?

53. Youtube
Why: Have you seen the things on Youtube? *shudders*

54. Nascar
Why: Added at the request of Smokescreen and Ratchet as they claim it has traumatizing effects.

55. Demolition Derbies
Why: Counselling costs too much (though Smokescreen wasn't complaining).

56. Pokemon
Why: Requested by Blaster. Note to Crew: No, the Cassettes are not Pokemon and you do not need to catch them all.

57. Digimon
Why: Red Alert, Wheeljack, and Perceptor. Red Alert is paranoid enough, and Wheeljack and Perceptor have already caused more than enough damage.

58. First Person Shooter Games
Why: Prowl, who somehow figured out how to program the targets to look like the twins and Jazz.. Note to twins and Jazz: Please leave Prowl alone when he is in that kind of mood.


Tags: fanfiction, transformers
Subscribe

  • Random Andromeda/Doctor Who Crossover Bunny

    The Doctor lands on Earth in the far future and meets a 15 year old Seamus Harper. Harper would have traveled with him forever if the Doctor hadn't…

  • Avengers

    I have an Avengers (2012) bunny that I don't yet know where to post. So I'm putting it here. Inspired by Duty Bound by agarwaenloth (on AO3).…

  • Doctor Who Music Video

    Dad showed me this great video just now!

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 55 comments
Previous
← Ctrl ← Alt
Next
Ctrl → Alt →
Previous
← Ctrl ← Alt
Next
Ctrl → Alt →

  • Random Andromeda/Doctor Who Crossover Bunny

    The Doctor lands on Earth in the far future and meets a 15 year old Seamus Harper. Harper would have traveled with him forever if the Doctor hadn't…

  • Avengers

    I have an Avengers (2012) bunny that I don't yet know where to post. So I'm putting it here. Inspired by Duty Bound by agarwaenloth (on AO3).…

  • Doctor Who Music Video

    Dad showed me this great video just now!